I wonder what I will miss

Kitchen "Help"

I wonder what I will miss someday...surely I will miss the paint on the car that was scraped off in a moment of chaos. The chaos of 4 enthusiastic kids who were allowed to shop at a garage sale, one dog happy to see her human, and my mind set on getting dinner on the table as it was already dinner time and the food hadn't made itself...and the fateful moment when someone (me? a kid? we'll never know) closed the garage door on the open van door. Yes I'll miss the paint, but will I miss the chaos?

Will I miss the Radio Flyer bike, always underfoot, either zooming around with a toddler on it or left right in the kitchen, right where I am going to step...pushing it away is futile, the front wheels are always left turned so, like a boomerang, pushing it away only causes it to roll right around, right back in to my space.

Will I miss the invasion of space when I have "my space" someday? An adult bathroom without toothpaste smeared on the towels, no pee on the floor, the counter-top wiped rather than left splattered?

Will I miss the pitter patter of feet in the morning? The pace that only children can manage to attain immediately upon wakening. Or books at bedtime? The books that are for children but somehow feel like endless novels to parents who just want to get kids in bed so they can clean up and accomplish two more tasks before heading to bed themselves? Or the sleeping kids strewn around the house? (yes ok I already love this one, sleeping kids are so sweet...and silly)

The lack of chaos, personal space, the uninterrupted morning quiet, the time I could spend "being productive." Do I value it all too highly? The structure, the productivity, am I focused on this too much and missing out now on enjoying what I will miss in the future? Yes. Maybe. And yet as parents I think we are all too often focused on trying to perform perfectly, second-guessing whether or not we enjoyed it enough, worried that we're not doing this right. Stressing ourselves so much we can't possibly enjoy ANY of it. Even the good things. I include myself in this some days. So honestly, I think I will miss the chaos and the noise, the toys and the energy level, but I think it's also ok to be bothered a bit by them. I'll try to slow down and enjoy the books, but I don't have to enjoy the toothpaste on the towels. I'll try to slow down and play with my kids, picking up their toys for them once in awhile but still teaching them that other people don't appreciate treasures strewn about the house. And someday, I'm sure I'll miss it, but for today, goodness let's avoid the garage sales and keep that paint on the car where it belongs!